Sideshow: Madonna has Russian all atwitter

Madonna may no longer be relevant to the younger generations, but aging government officials are still liable to blow a gasket over her statements. In the latest, Russian Deputy Prime Minister Dmitry Rogozin has penned an offensive tweet ostensibly about Madonna (she's skillfully left unnamed) in the wake of Madge's outspoken words of support for the Russian punk band Pussy Riot. "Every former w. wants to give lectures on morality when she grows old," Rogozin writes. "Especially during foreign tours." The Associated Press says, "By 'w.' he apparently meant 'whore.' "

On Tuesday, Madonna saluted the all-female Pussy Riot in her Moscrow concert. The Russian trio is on trial for staging a protest against President Vladimir Putin.

The wedding of the ages? Nope

A gossip frenzy Friday with reports that the wedding of the ages, The Official Brangelinazation of Brangelina, was set to take place Saturday at the couple's ultra-cool, ultra-secluded $35 mil estate in the South of France, Chateau Miraval. It's probably not.

Unnamed, perhaps even unnamable, sources tell the British tabloid the Sun that Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie's houshold has been a beehive of wedding-preparation activity, of buzzings to and buzzings fro by agents from outlets floral, gastronomic, and libational.

Other reports say Brad is hosting a 50th-anniversary bash for his parents, Jane and Bill. Yet other reports said the chateau is quiet, empty, and, um, quiet.

A case against Johnny Depp?

L.A. Superior Court Judge Michael Johnson has ruled that a lawsuit filed anonymously by a woman who claims Johnny Depp's bodyguards roughed her up would have to be thrown out unless the woman files it under her real name.

The 52-year-old woman, who suffers from fibromyalgia, says Depp's bodyguards stopped her wh! en she w as trying to get to her seat in the VIP section of an Iggy and the Stooges concert. TMZ, which identifies the woman by name, says she claims in court papers that Depp's he-men handcuffed her and dragged her through the venue, "exposing her buttocks to other Hollywood Palladium theater patrons."

Oprah tells it like it is

Oprah has always drawn the crowds with her celebrity chats. What better way to save her fledgling cable network than stock up on a few serious boldface interviews. On Aug. 19, the Big O will rap with Rihanna.

"She's thoughtful. She was very emotional. She was vulnerable. And she pushes the edge. A lot," O says of R.

Promos promise Rihanna's troubled history with Chris Brown, convicted of assaulting her, will come up.

"It was embarrassing. It was humiliating. I lost my best friend," Rihanna says of the February 2009 incident. "[And] I was resentful. I held a grudge. I was dark." There's more. USAToday.com says O will make a cameo appearance on E!'s superb cultural forum, Keeping Up With the Kardashians, on Aug. 26. That same day, O will air an interview with Olympics hero Gabby Douglas.

Sudeikis: White House not enough

Saturday Night Live star Jason Sudeikis has been making a name with his spot-on impressions of GOP presidential candidate Mitt Romney. But he says the chance to star in election skits may not be enough to keep him at SNL. The Los Angeles Times indicates he's holding out for a bigger payday.

Sheen re-re-resurrects career?

The New York Daily News says Charlie Sheen, whose ninja antics got him fired from the most popular sitcom since Tutankhamun, Two and a Half Men, may have struck it big with his new show, Anger Management. Chas' manager says the FX show is poised to be renewed for a whopping 90-episode run.This article contains information! from In quirer wire services. Contact "SideShow" at sideshow@phillynews.com.